My first trip on an airplane was as a 22-month-old flying from Colombo, Sri Lanka to Fayetteville, Arkansas via California. I lived in 13 houses in the first 18 years of my life and split my childhood between coconut trees in a small province in the Philippines, idyllic Arkansan suburbs and smoggy Manila.
When you start your life as a third culture kid, it turns out you just keep looking for it and it keeps looking for you. University came next, again in northwest Arkansas, and I followed that with three years in Australia, a trip around the world, which is how I met the man who would become my husband in Geneva. We lived there for three years before moving in 2013 to Stockholm, Sweden. This summer, we packed up our life in Stockholm for our epic move to the far side of the sea, Melbourne, Australia.
I’ve moved on average every three to four years in my 33 years, it’s a way of life written into my DNA, stamped on my passport and echoed in the chambers of my heart.
But moving to a different country is one thing as a child or teenager. Moving as the parent is a different story. This is where you find me today, in the middle of my second international move with kids. So here it is, Falling Forward: 31 Days of Thoughts and Tips on Transition.
Because transition is all about falling: falling apart, falling down, falling in love, and because transition is all about moving forward, into the next thing, to the new place, to the new life that is waiting. There will be some reflective writing, but there will also be many practical, short tips. You can expect posts on grief and talking to kids about moving, tips on car and air travel, making bucket lists, taking it slow and saying goodbye.
I wrote most of these posts in Husband’s childhood home in Frankfurt, Germany, literally in the middle of the most transition-heavy month of my life. Our kids woke up too early, we went to bed too late, we are all grieving in different ways, and we were (are) blind exhausted. I am not writing this out of any expertise, but out of a desperate need for these things to be true in my life. These are notes to myself first, ones I hope will resonate with you as well. Yes, I grew up moving around every three to four years, but no, that didn’t make me an expert. It has only been the past five years that taught me how to grieve, let go, practice gratitude and embrace the new, good things.
This series is somewhat specific to physical moves and the emotional upheaval that comes with it, I hope that whatever life transition you find yourself in right now, you will find a kindred spirit in the thoughts expressed here. This is my offering to those of you who are in the middle of the life change, may you find rest and peace in these words this month, and may we be each other’s companions on the journey.
Now it’s your turn: If you are new to the blog or an old friend and are following along for this series, please say hello in the comments box. What kind of life transition are you in right now?
Here is a rough schedule of post for the next four weeks. I’ll update this page daily with the new links for easy navigation.
October 2 Finding a new rhythm
October 4 Transition inspiration
October 5 An anchor that cannot be moved
October 6 Grief and loss in transition
October 7 Anger and grief in transition
October 8 Expect and accept negative emotions
October 10 Transition Story – a guest post
October 11 Transition inspiration
October 13 Ebenezers and what we leave behind
October 14 Declutter and get help
October 15 Marriage on the move
October 16 Make space for beauty
October 17 Transition story – a guest post
October 18 Transition inspiration
October 19 On moving day and saying goodbye
October 21 Car travel with kids
October 22 Air travel with kids
October 23 Travel and a giveaway
October 24 Transition story – guest post
October 25 Transition inspiration
October 30
12 thoughts on “falling forward: thoughts & tips on transition”
very Glad you are back on the blogging trail. I resonated with some of this, in my eternal state of transition through basically five countries in as many years and never coming to a place of rest:
“Because transition is all about falling: falling apart, falling down, falling in love, and because transition is all about moving forward, into the next thing, to the new place, to the new life that is waiting. … expect posts on grief and talking to kids about moving (in my case, other people’s kids who are sad I’m leaving), tips on car and air travel, making bucket lists, taking it slow and saying goodbye.”
On and on it goes. I appreciate your commentary, it helps me know my own moments of overflowing with frustration or sadness are really not so weak or irrational.
literally in the middle of the most transition-heavy month of my life. [I wake] too early, went to bed too late, grieving in different ways [and surprising moments], and [at times I am] blind exhausted and just want to go home and hide, wherever that is. I am trying to learn how to grieve, let go, practice gratitude and embrace the new, good things, have hope for the future and trust in a God who promises he will not “abandon the works of his hands”… “my word that goes out will not return empty, but will accomplish the purpose for which i sent it.” For which He sent me.
Bon voyage Devi – you’re encouraging many through your transparency and experiences of the faithfulness of God.
My friend, thanks for your words here. Praying this series is an encouragement to your heart!
This looks wonderful! We work for a missions organization but haven’t moved overseas (yet), but the past few years have been filled with transition, and we anticipate more!
it is hard to explain to someone who has always lived in the same place, with the same group of friends, the same job, the same family dynamic, what a difference transition makes… how much time is lost to packing and unpacking, tiredness, finding new doctors, discovering a new grocery store, and meltdowns because life seems so overwhelming!
I am grateful that the lord has called us to this life, but I look forward to some guidance in navigating these transitions… look forward to your series!
Kelly, welcome, it’s so great to “meet” you. My parents were missionaries, so I get that lifestyle, too (I grew up on the mission field). And yes to the fatigue. I think I’ve spent most of the last few years tired, and it wasn’t just because of my kids. The decision making takes so much more time in a different country, and something as simple as a phone bill takes time to decode and figure out. So glad that you will be following along. Your perspective will be so valuable here.
Love it. We just moved to Missouri from Canada…i say “just”, but it has already been 6 months! and i still feel like i am transitioning, after being away from the states for 12 years. my best friend (from Taiwan) lives in arkansas. i am so happy we are finally geographically in the same area that we can see each other. i’m looking forward to this series! blessings to you and family – moving is not for the faint of heart! <3
Hi Emily, so glad you are following along. It usually takes me two years to feel like I’ve found my feet in a place, so at six months I would say you are just getting started. It so helps to be in a place where you can speak the language though, I do think that’s what made transitions in Europe so much rougher for me.
I’m very interested in what you have to say about this topic. Sounds like you’ve obviously gone through a lot of transitions in your life. 🙂 Thanks for sharing what you know!
Thanks Ruth and welcome! I wish lots of experiences make someone an expert, unfortunately I have learned the very, very hard way on most of these things.. hope you will stick around for the series.
hello! Just now finding this. Cant wait to find time to read more! Hope you and your family are well!
So glad you found it Cari!!! Love to you. I sent you an email :).
Hi Devi!
I, too, am just finding this and so happy! Mark and I plan to call DR Congo our home by the end of this month, so our lives are also in transition.